A PAINFUL DIVORCE

“When he got home that night as his wife served dinner, he held her hand and said, I’ve got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again the man observed the hurt in her eyes. Suddenly he didn’t know how to open his mouth. But he had to let her know what he was thinking. I want a divorce. The Man raised the topic calmly. The wife didn’t seem to be annoyed by What she heard, instead she asked softly, why?

The husband avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at him, you are not a man! That night, they didn’t talk to each other. She was weeping. He knew she wanted to find out what had happened to their marriage. But the man could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost his heart to Jane. He didn’t love her anymore. He was just managing the marriage, he just pitied her!

With a deep sense of guilt, he drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of his company. She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. The husband felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but he could not take back what I had said for he loved Jane so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of him, which was what he had expected to see. To him, her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed him for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.

Part 2

The next day, the husband came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. He didn’t have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because he was tired after an eventful day with Jane. When he woke up, she was still there at the table writing. he just did not care so he turned over and was asleep again. In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn’t want anything from him, but needed a month’s notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month they both will struggle to live as normal life as possible. Her reasons were simple: their son had his exams in a month’s time and she didn’t want to disrupt him with the emotional event that comes with broken marriage.

This was agreeable to him. But she had something more, she asked him to recall how he had carried her into their bridal room on their wedding day. She requested that every day for the month’s duration he should carry her out of their bedroom to the front door ever morning. The man thought the wife was going crazy. Just to make their last days together bearable he accepted her odd request.

Part 3

He told Jane (his new found lover) about his wife’s divorce conditions.  She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully.

His wife and him hadn’t had any body contact since his divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when he carried her out on the first day, they both appeared clumsy. Their son clapped behind them, “daddy is holding mommy in his arms”. His words brought him a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, he walked over ten meters with her in his arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don’t tell our son about the divorce. He nodded, feeling somewhat upset. he put her down outside the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. Then he drove alone to the office.

On the second day, both of them acted much more easily. She leaned on his chest. He could smell the fragrance of her blouse. The man realized that he hadn’t looked at this woman carefully for a long time. He realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Their marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute he wondered what he had done to her.

Part 4

On the fourth day, when he lifted her up, the man felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to him. On the fifth and sixth day, he realized that their sense of intimacy was growing again. he didn’t tell Jane about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made him even stronger.

She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. He suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why he could carry her more easily.

Suddenly it hit him… she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously he reached out and touched her head.

Their son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it’s time to carry mom out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. His wife gestured to their son to come closer and hugged him tightly. The husband turned his face away because he was afraid he might change my mind at this last minute. he then held her in his arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded his neck softly and naturally. He held her body tightly; it was just like their wedding day.

But her much lighter weight made him sad. On the last day, when he held her in his arms the husband could hardly move a step. Their son had gone to school. He held her tightly and said, “I hadn’t noticed that our life lacked intimacy”. As he drove to office…. jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. He was afraid any delay would make him change his mind…he walked upstairs. Jane opened the door and he made the pronouncement to her, Sorry, Jane, I do not want the divorce anymore.

Part 5

She looked at him, astonished, and then touched his forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. He moved her hand off his head. Sorry, Jane, ‘I said, I won’t divorce my wife again’. His marriage life was boring probably because he and his wife didn’t value the details of their lives, not because they didn’t love each other anymore. Now he realizes that since he carried her into his home on their wedding day he was supposed to hold her until deaths do them apart. Jane seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave him a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. The man walked downstairs and drove away. At the floral shop on the way, he ordered a bouquet of flowers for his wife. The salesgirl asked him what to write on the card and he smiled and wrote, I’ll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.

That evening as he arrived home, with the flowers in his hands, a smile on my face, the man run up stairs, only to find his wife in the bed -dead. His wife had been fighting CANCER for months and he was so busy with Jane to even notice. She knew that she would die soon and she wanted to save him from whatever negative reaction from their son, in case we push through with the divorce. At least, in the eyes of their son – he’s a loving husband….

For you reading this piece, know today that the small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be your spouse’s friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. If you are not in a relationship now, remember this for the second (or third) time around. It's never too late.

If you don’t share this, nothing will happen to you. If you do, you just might save a marriage. Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.

We shall always inspire you for greatness, because that’s our job.

We shall speak out ills that will help better the life of someone out there, because we are #TEMPOZZYSPEAKS

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